Monday, October 31, 2011

Sometimes I Wish…

by Diana on October 31, 2011

in Life

Warning: (I think) most of you guys read TCL for fun stories, recipes, and (perhaps one of two of you for) outfit posts. This post is random and rambling, so if you’re looking for the usual blog post here, you may want to skip this one.

I apologize for being a little MIA over the last several days. I’ve been feeling…overwhelmed…just with everyday life. I wrote the following when I was having a low moment last Monday morning. You know that feeling you get after spending a long period of time (weeks, even months, if not years) of running yourself into the ground resulting in you feeling so stressed and fatigued that you find yourself wanting to cry for no reason? I’ve hesitated posting this because it always seems to read much more dramatic than it actually is, but maybe I’m thinking about this too much? Hopefully, you don’t think I sound like too much of a drama queen…

Sometimes I wish I weren’t so stressed.
I wish I didn’t blog at midnight or 1 am because that’s the first time I’ve had all day to do it.
I wish I had more days with more than 1 hour of free time. Even when you’re doing mostly fun things, it can be stressful to not have any downtime.
I wish I didn’t leave my laundry in the dryer (or in the laundry basket in my living room) because I desperately need clean clothes but don’t have time to fold it once it’s done.
I wish I were better at saying “no”.
I wish I didn’t run around my house in between getting home and going to my next to-do, tossing things around like a tornado.
I wish my work weren’t so demanding.
I wish I had longer than 15 minutes of break time (yea that includes/is my lunch break) in my average work day.
I wish I didn’t cry at my desk at work.
I wish that I didn’t lay on the couch for just 15 or 30 minutes at the end of the day because it gave me a false sense of relaxing when I really should be heading straight to bed.
I wish there were more hours in the day. More days in the week. Or at least more days in a weekend.

But through all of this, I do my best to level set and reality check. I know there are many people struggling much worse than I am. I know this exhaustion is the sign of a gift because it means I have the ability to do (or at least try to do) all these things. It means I have a husband (and dog) to love, family to visit, friends who want to hang out with me, creative outlets, an exercise that is not a burden but a joy to do, the ability to teach Zumba, and a job…oh a job in this economy (no matter how stressful) is indeed a good thing. I have a lot to be thankful for, and I am.

The more straightforward solution to the stress is the one that hubby keeps suggesting – downsizing. But, exhausted as I am, I love everything too much to let anything go (ahh, so stubborn…I know). Some people have suggested that the blog is what’s taking up so much of my time, but I haven’t posted in a few days now and didn’t post a couple days before the poetry post. And you know what…I don’t feel any less stressed. In fact, after I published that poetry post, I actually felt…better. So, looks like the show will go on here on TCL.

Things are a little hectic right now, but I appreciate you coming along for the ride.

Thanks for reading,
Diana

Reader question #1: Do you ever feel overwhelmed by everyday life?
Reader question #2: Have something to get off your chest? Fill in the blank: Sometimes I wish________________.

Related Posts with Thumbnails

{ 44 comments }