Why You Should NOT Manifest a Specific Person

Can you manifest a specific person? Yes! You can manifest ANYTHING using the Law of Attraction. But what I want to talk about in this post and video is why you should NOT manifest a specific person. Hint: It’s because I think you can get even better results with manifesting your soulmate another way! Of course, this is simply my opinion, and if you truly wish to desire your specific person, I say go for it!

Let’s jump in…

*VIDEO* My Experience Manifesting an SP and Why I Think You Shouldn’t (In My Opinion)

Be sure to watch my video for my full explanation and some fun examples.

Click here to watch my video about manifesting a specific person if the above player doesn’t work

Can You Manifest a Specific Person?

Yes! I want to be super clear that you definitely can manifest a specific person. Additionally, to respond to some of the feedback I’ve received on this topic, yes, you also can manifest that person to change. It’s just my *opinion* that you shouldn’t.

But ultimately, you can manifest pretty much anything using the Law of Attraction.

Now, some LoA teachers say you can literally manifest anything. I like prefer to say that you can manifest *almost* anything. Perhaps I’m too rooted to my 3D experience, but in my opinion, if you’re a 70 year old 5 foot tall woman, you will most likely not be able to manifest playing as a starting line-up member playing regularly for an NBA team. I’m willing to be wrong here, I just haven’t heard of someone manifesting something like this.

Perhaps this is due to my approach of working with manifestation and Law of Attraction from a practical-meets-woo POV.

Two Reasons You Should NOT Manifest a Specific Person

So we’ve already established that you can manifest a specific person. But beyond that, should you do it? I have two reasons I think you should NOT.

Should you manifest a specific person? In this post and video, I share why I think you should NOT and how to get EVERYTHING you want in a relationship! #lawofattraction #loa #manifestation #manifest #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #woowoo #changeyourlife #goodvibes #manifestlove #highvibes #spirituality #theuniverse

And before we jump in, I’ve heard many stories about manifesting a specific person going both well and not so well. When it comes to success with Law of Attraction in the love department, I wanted to share my thoughts based on my personal experiences. But I’d love to hear from you if you’ve manifested a specific person, so do comment your story below!

Reason #1: You may manifest a specific person but not get your needs truly met (or may have to do a TON of mental gymnastics to manifest needs they don’t yet have)

Here's one reason you should NOT manifest a specific person. Check out my post and video for reason number 2! And how to attract your true love using Law of Attraction #lawofattraction #loa #manifestation #manifest #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #woowoo #changeyourlife #goodvibes #manifestlove #highvibes #spirituality #theuniverse

Pre-note: I’ve been reading a TON about this in various Facebook groups, YouTube comments, etc. and what I’m sharing is based on what I’ve heard time and time again. I read so much pain and struggle in people trying to manifest a specific person and wanting to change so many things about them. I’ve heard of people putting their lives on pause for YEARS trying to manifest a SP, and it’s just my opinion there’s a better way to get what you ultimately want – love. Now every once in awhile, someone will pop in and say, “That’s not me! My specific person is perfect for me, and I’ll manifest them!”. Okay cool. You do you. This post isn’t for everyone, and it sounds like it’s not for you. If so, the rest of this post will be unhelpful for you, so no need to read further. I’m sending you all the love and best wishes on your SP manifesting.

So say you’re looking for a relationship with someone where you have the following, and they:

  1. like to travel with you
  2. respect you
  3. make you feel loved
  4. like to hold your hand
  5. make you feel safe

But you’ve had a crush on this guy, Joe, and you decide to manifest a relationship with him. In the relationship, you find out that he respects you, makes you feel loved, and likes to hold your hand, but…

…he does not like to travel (he’s a homebody), and he doesn’t make you feel safe (he’s a trusting soul and leaves the doors unlocked, among other things). Now you have a relationship where you may (keyword=”may”) have to compromise on traveling with your significant other and getting that feeling of safety you desire.

Of course, this is just ONE example, and you could have manifested a different specific person who DOES give you all the things you want. This isn’t a case of always having one or the other. A specific person certainly CAN give you everything you want.

The key here is that focusing on a specific person opens you up to the possibility of either compromising on what you truly want or having to do a TON of mental gymnastics to manifest them to have the things they’re currently lacking.


The Challenge of Knowing Our Specific Person

Abraham Hicks talks a lot about how it’s SO much easier for us to manifest based on our physical experience. This is one way our manifestations can be blocked because we can be so aligned to the energy of what we already know that it’s hard to align to the energy of what we truly desire when it’s different.

So if your specific person doesn’t have all the qualities you want, you’ll have to overcome what you already know about them to manifest them having those qualities.

I mean…think about what you may want to change about yourself / your life. And now you have to do that for yourself AND for them?

Tuning Into You

Yes, the Universe is unlimited. You can manifest anything with the Law of Attraction. But we are spiritual beings in imperfect human form, living a physical experience, and that human form can unfortunately come with some limitations. I don’t want to create limiting beliefs for you but instead ask you to tune into what is true for YOU.

You can do whatever you want with your time and energy, but mental gymnastics are not for me. I prefer manifesting from a more flow space and leaning more into surrendering and trusting that the Universe has a better plan than me (as Gabby Bernstein says).

So, what if you could get EVERYTHING you want from a significant other an easier way? You can! This brings me to my next point…

Reason #2: You cut the Universe off from giving you the full abundance and limitless possibility available to you

Here's one reason you should NOT manifest a specific person. Check out my post and video for reason number 1! Plus, what if you could manifest EVERYTHING you want to attract LOVE? #lawofattraction #loa #manifestation #manifest #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #woowoo #changeyourlife #goodvibes #manifestlove #highvibes #spirituality #theuniverse

In the example with Joe, you got your guy, but you had to compromise in a couple areas of your relationship (or put a lot of work into manifesting him changing).

Whereas if you focus on manifesting your ideal relationship, you will get EVERYTHING you want – whether it’s your specific person OR someone else. The Universe is full of abundance and limitless possibility, so there are many matches who can give you everything you’re looking for in a relationship!

You can guarantee having a relationship that gives you all of these:

  1. like to travel with you
  2. respect you
  3. make you feel loved
  4. like to hold your hand
  5. make you feel safe

If you focus your thoughts on the above qualities and are open to the Universe delivering the perfect person for you.

I actually manifested my ideal relationship by focusing on a list of ideal SO qualities. At the time, I thought there was someone I already knew who may be my ideal match. However, I ended up dating someone completely different.

Could I have manifested the person I knew? Probably! However, that person most likely not have moved to SF with me, and I wasn’t interested in a long distance relationship. So, it seems to have worked out well!

Want to Manifest Love?

Learn how you can manifest ANYTHING you want using the Law of Attraction

Is Manifesting a Specific Person Wrong or Bad?

One of the most common questions I’ve heard about manifesting an SP is: “Is manifesting a specific person wrong?” Well, the answer is…it depends.

It depends on your belief system.

From my research, there are a couple schools of thought on this:

  • Yes, it’s wrong, because it’s wrong to manifest against someone’s free will
  • No, it’s not wrong, because somewhere out there in the multiverse or multi-worlds there is a version of reality where you and you and your SP are together in perfect harmony, and you can shift into that reality at your choosing

Let’s discuss both of these further so you can find what feels most true to you.

Manifesting Against Someone’s Free Will Is Wrong

Some argue that manifesting a specific person is wrong because it could be manifesting against that person’s free will in a manipulative / negative way.

This is complicated because not everyone agrees that free will even exists in manifestation.

Additionally, if you’re manifesting a specific person, but that person is manifesting someone very different from you – who would win? The person who was better at manifesting? Could the stronger manifestor bend the free will of the other?

From a purely practical POV, if manifesting a specific person feels wrong to you, it’s probably not a good idea to try it. If it feels wrong to you, chances are good that your subconscious will self-sabotage you. Or if it works you’ll feel guilty and bring negative emotions into the relationship.

But you need to choose what feels most true to you. And there’s another option.

Part of why some people argue that free will isn’t a thing is due to the next section on multi-worlds.

Manifesting an SP in the Multi-World (Or Multiverse) Is Okay

There is a theory in Quantum Mechanics that multiple versions of reality exist at the same time. And some manifestation teachers believe you can use manifestation techniques to shift into the reality that has anything you want.

Think Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness. Sort of.

The Many-Worlds Interpretation (MWI) of quantum mechanics holds that there are many worlds which exist in parallel at the same space and time as our own.

Source: stanford.edu

When it comes to manifestation – even a different thought could put you into one world versus a different one. So to manifest your SP, you’d need to choose the thoughts, energy, etc. that would shift you into the reality where you and your SP are happy.

Also, some people reference multi-worlds and the multiverse interchangeably, but they are different in quantum mechanics.

What are your thoughts on these schools of thought? Comment below!

What the Experts Say About Manifesting a Specific Person

As this blog post and video have garnered a lot of attention, I’ve decided to see what the experts say. As I gather additional information from the best Law of Attraction teachers out there, I’ll add that here.

Gabby Bernstein on Manifesting a Specific Person

Gabby Bernstein is one of my favorite Law of Attraction teachers. I was very curious what she would say about this highly-debated topic. Luckily, I found her answer on her site:

So a reader named Alina commented on Gabby’s blog post “How to Use Manifesting to Get Anything You Want: My Interview with Marie Forleo”. Alina shared that she had been trying to manifest her SP for about a year without success and asked Gabby for help.

Gabby replied that it was great that Alina was clear on what she wanted. But also to let go and trust the Universe. She also suggested Alina focus on the prayer/mantra “this or something better” because “love shows up in a totally different package, as a different person, and in an unexpected place.”

I know Gabby is huge on focusing on your true desires and releasing control. So this aligns with what I thought she may say. As well as how I also approach manifestation and experienced the most success.


In short, whilst you can manifest a specific person and that person CAN give you everything you want, I personally find the risk of compromising on what I want in an ideal relationship too high.

Definitely check out the above video for more details and a couple additional examples.

Get INSTANT access to this POWERFUL free manifestation training - How to Overcome Your Manifestation Blocks. Use this to understand why Law of Attraction is not working for you, and what you can to do manifest with ease. Great for beginners! #lawofattraction #loa #manifestation #manifest #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #goodvibes #highvibes #spirituality #theuniverse #mindset #LawOfVibration #successhabits

More Manifestation Inspo

How I Manifested Love / My Boyfriend

How to Manifest Someone to Text You

How to Use Jealousy to Attract LOVE to Your Life

How I Manifested My Dream Luxury Apartment

How Seeing Repeating Numbers Helps Your Manifestations

How I Overcame My Back Injury Using Law of Attraction


Wishing you love and happiness whether you manifest a specific person or focus on your ideal relationship qualities.

What do you think? Should you manifest a specific person? I’d love to know your thoughts and hear from anyone who’s done it on how their experience went. Comment below!

22 thoughts on “Why You Should NOT Manifest a Specific Person”

  1. Hi, I had a question about manifesting relationships. What if you’re considering manifesting a friendship, because you see I have a best friend named Justina and we’re in high school but recently I moved to a different school and in the past times that I changed schools I have lost contact with some great friends. I have other friends at this school but Justina is the most true friend I have ever had and there is no one else like her. My biggest concern is that we don’t like to keep in contact much over the phone since we much rather talk to each other in person. What would be the best possible way to manifest my relationship with her so that we stay friends.

  2. Actually, this article was good but you put on too many limitations. If you want to manifest your specific person and they love to travel, you can manifest that. Why so many limitations?

    • I agree with you. I am manifesting an sp and I just affirm “we are perfectly compatible” and “he shows up to me exactly the way I need him to.” No mental gymnastics necessary. If you can manifest someone to want to be with you, it’s easy to manifest that they also like to travel or like to hold you hand. No need to affirm for every little thing, just affirm you’re compatible/soulmates. She said it wouldn’t have worked out with her old sp anyways because he wouldn’t want to move to SF with her, but she could have easily affirmed that he wants to move there with her. It’s her choice of course, but sounds like she’s giving them free will. People new to loa can be very misled by limiting beliefs like this 🙁

      • So this article was more of an opinion piece rather than saying “this is the only way it works”. 🙂 I definitely acknowledged in the post that you can manifest anything, including manifesting your sp to show up how you want. I didn’t get into it here, but beyond free will, there is also the multiverse idea where there is a perfect multiverse where you and your sp are happy together and you can shift into that if you want.

        The reason I shared this is because I’ve read hundreds of comments online of people stressed out about manifesting an sp – about it not working, about how they got them but then it ended up not working. And I think the reason is because for most people, it can be a real challenge to get into the thinking that it will work out and the sp will shift into what they want. So this article is for those manifesting who are probably earlier in their manifesting journey who are maybe newer to shifting their thoughts, releasing the outcome, and trusting the Universe/higher power. I’ll consider editing the post in the future to clarify this. Cheers!

      • I agree. I think if you’re preaching LoA and claiming to be well versed in the practice you shouldn’t be telling anybody what they should and shouldn’t be manifesting. It’s counterintuitive to the very definition of law of attraction. Some people want a car, some people want money, some people want a specific person. If this topic doesn’t resonate with you maybe you sould stick to what you actually know well and let others guide people in manifesting an SP.

        • Manifesting a car and manifesting a specific person are very different things. Yes, to the Universe/your higher power, manifesting a penny is as easy as manifesting a million dollars. From what I’ve researched about manifesting a specific person, there are many additional things that come into play – karma, free will, spells, multiverse, multi-world, etc. There’s also the part about the person manifesting managing the 3D realities of their human form (overcoming their unique limiting beliefs, dealing with past experiences that influence their belief system, etc). There are many schools of thought on manifesting an SP. I don’t go into Facebook groups, etc. trying to change the minds of others. This is my blog, so I’m sharing my thoughts, opinions, and personal experiences here. Lastly, I do say in my blog post that if someone wants to manifest an SP they should go for it. Thanks for stopping by.

  3. My boyfriend broke up with me almost a month ago, so pretty recently and a few nights ago I had an urge to manisfest him back into my life. Our relationship was always a little bumpy but never anything extreme and when he broke up with me I was obviously devastated and it seemed like he could care less but I know that’s not true, anyways we started to have less and less contact as time went on so I started to manifest and out of the blue he on added me unfollowed me blocked my number. Which is weird because we haven’t really talked since we broke up so it was just out of the blue I’m not sure if I continue to manifest or if I need to except my fate as it is right now

    • Hi Jessica, I’m sorry for the delayed response here and also sorry to hear about your break up. That is always a tough thing to experience and work through. The good news is – You get to choose whatever you want in this life. There are no limitations with the Law of Attraction. Have you gained any new clarity over the last couple months?

  4. Interesting. Several years ago, I bought a cute little house in a cute little town. It was a fixer-upper, and I had no idea how to approach the renovations (I’m in my seventies and widowed).
    So, I decided I’d manifest myself a boyfriend/handyman. Or maybe a handyman/ boyfriend. LOL.
    I didn’t have a specific person in mind, but I had a long list of talents he needed. Sure enough, he showed up. He was also in his seventies and a widower; a master carpenter and a jack of all trades.
    We went together for about three years, then we drifted apart. He’s now happily attached to another widow in town who also needed a handyman and I’m happily alone with a much-improved house. It works!

  5. Hi, a few months ago, February to be exact, i tried manifesting my now boyfriend to be attracted to me. I only tried manifesting for one day and never tried again and completely forgot about it. We did end up getting together and Im happy about our relationship but I now regret it and thinking it might have to do with the manifesting and feel awful because now I feel like it was against his free will. Can you help me? Should I tell him? thank you.

  6. is manifesting a specific person taking away their free will? I was talking with some friends about it and they said I shouldn’t do it because the person I like should like me for who I am. Thanks for this article btw it was very helpful 🙂

    • Hi Emily, This is a great question! From what I’ve researched, there are 2 different schools of thought (could be more, but I’ll focus on these 2 to answer your question). The first is free will, which as you mentioned is the idea that people have free will, and you can’t or shouldn’t manifest against that. Besides free will, a lot of LoA teachers talk about focusing on what you want and letting the Universe/God/your higher power bring the best, most aligned match to you (which is what this article is about). The other school of thought is about the multiverse / multi-worlds, which says that there are many different possible worlds out there, and somewhere out there is a world where you and your SP are matched and happy and you can manifest your way into that version of reality. Hope this helps! 🙂

  7. Hi Diana. that’s a very helpful article. I had one question in my mind. he has been the most handsome person of my college and is 7-8 years older than me. we became friends on social media, started sharing conversations and ended up having feelings for each other. we got separated twice in a period of almost 2 years. I did manifested for him to love me back, care for me, drop the third party. although I discontinued to manifest him after awhile while I looked at tings practically. however, the thing that I am unable to understand is that why do we end up seeing each other in the most unexpected ways? why do we have so much in common? why do I used to feel my highest femininity when I was around him ? why do I intuitively feel fate is bringing us together again and again ? why so strong feelings?
    even though I am continuing well in my life without him, working on my life, taking care of myself and my family, focusing on self development and studies, extracurricular activities, having fun with friends , but why a part of my heart and even mind keeps on making me alert that me and this guy hold a special and string connection ? why?
    He comes from a highly educated, rich family and I come from a barely educated middle class family. I don’t even match his financial status. he has this girl in his life, he has also told his parents about her, unfortunately, his parents are not agreeing for their marriage for some reasons.
    why? I know I am not as qualified, as gorgeous, as rich as him at the moment but why our ways keep on attracting us for each other? even when we are least expecting or don’t want at all and wanna move past from each other? what is this? can you answer that ?

    • Hi Noor, The best person to answer this question is truly you. As a coach, I believe my clients have the answers within themselves. I think it’s wonderful you’re focusing on yourself and staying in good energy. To get clarity, you can check out my post about how to connect to source energy and ask for guidance from the Universe/your higher power from that connected space. You can also ask for guidance during meditation or ask for guidance during stream of consciousness journaling. At times in my life where I’ve been confused, I’ve tried all of these for guidance. Sometimes it takes awhile, but the answer will come together for you. Hope this is helpful.

  8. Hi!

    Today I’ve used affirmations with a specific person and I got scared after finding out that I shouldn’t do it. Then I came across your blog and I am kind of more calm. The reason why I want to manifest a specific person in the first place is that I’ve been in a relationship with my bf and everything was in the right places! (not lying here or making myself feel better no no, not that, just being serious). The only obstacle was and is long-distance. He said he can’t take it anymore because it’s too hard for him. I feel like he isn’t in a good place in general due to a lot of things happening in his life and he decided to push away the person who is important to him. I believe it’s not the end and he will come back, I’m just scared rn that I might have jeopardised it by using affirmation with specific person

    • Don’t believe it’s an issue and it isn’t.

      Quite honestly, the article is junk advice with a clickbait title, as so many LOA ‘coaches’ and ‘gurus’ tend to put out.

      It’s designed to drum up interest and make them money, not to help people (regardless of what they might tell you).

      There is no hard rules to manifesting, so don’t believe the junk you read in places like this. Why do you think affirmations are bad for manifesting an SP? They are only bad if you believe they are.

      My advice to you, from one human to another; read Neville Goddard and learn about the Law of Assumption, and forget about the ‘Law of Attraction’.

      • Hi JTT, it appears you haven’t actually read my article. At the very top, I say, “Of course, this is simply my opinion, and if you truly wish to desire your specific person, I say go for it!” I stand by this post and do my best to put out quality (not “junk”) content. The beautiful thing about manifestation is that there are many different approaches for all of us. Thanks for sharing what works for you. Cheers!

  9. I am currently manifesting using my specific friend, keeping in mind the Universe may have other ideas. I would very much like to be my friend’s partner but am open to others. I tried this years ago and was hard-care about it being only this one person. In the meantime, another person came and went when I paid her no attention. Live and learn. While I would love to be my friend’s partner as I said, I also have a “this-or-something-better” attitude about it. Thank you for your opinion.

  10. Hi.

    This post found me at the right time. I have been on a few reddit threads trying to learn about manifesting and everyone says you HAVE to stay in the ‘end state’ and believe what you want/think to be true in order to really manifest it. Now, I broke up with someone I love couple of months back, and there are some real issues there. We’d been having fights for months. I don’t want to make any more efforts to reconcile because I have tried and I cannot chase anymore. So, I pray for healing every night and I say to the universe, “if this is meant to be, please help us find our way back , and if not then please help us both find what’s for our highest good.” Somebody on Reddit said that was wrong because I wasn’t making a choice and leaving it to a “higher power” to decide my fate.

    I don’t want to keep waiting for someone to change and grow up. I want a happy and healthy relationship, and if it’s not with my previous partner then with someone else.

    Am I saying something wrong in my prayers? Or doing something wrong by not “making the choice”? I personally feel much better praying this way than saying oh, I want HIM and only him. That feels like I’m not leaving either of us any choice. I don’t want him to come back because my manifestation brought him back. I want him to CHOOSE to come back and repair our relationship.


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